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Entry tags:
it stops tonight - 7
pg | chanyeol / xiumin ; & other members
abo au
summary: chanyeol loses his memory but he's working hard at getting his life back. he's almost there and yet... he feels like something is missing.
They walk back to the living quarters. Though their pack's base is more like an army base, the living quarters mimic a neighborhood of apartments. The walk back is silent and Chanyeol stops in front of Minseok's unit to drop Kangyeol off.
"You can make it back by yourself?" asks Kangyeol.
Chanyeol can see the capillaries in his older brother's eyes. He's been working hard and he looks tired.
"Of course" Chanyeol says with a somewhat forced smile. "I'm not a baby, you know."
Kangyeol smiles weakly and turns to enter the unit. Chanyeol watches as Kangyeol disappears behind the door. And yet...thinking that Minseok is also behind the door, Chanyeol can't bring himself to leave right away.
He stands there, staring at the door and trying to imagine what it would be like to enter as Kangyeol. And it's just when Chanyeol decides to go that he hears the shouting.
Chanyeol hears Minseok's voice first.
"You didn't go?! What were you doing instead?"
Minseok's voice takes on a high pitched strain that hurts Chanyeol's heart to hear. His older brother's voice comes next, trying to be soothing and logical. Still, Chanyeol hears the weariness in Kangyeol's voice.
"I took a hike instead. It's okay. It's just like physical therapy. What matters is..."
"What matters is that you listen to the doctor. You can't get better by doing what you want, Kangyeol!"
Physical therapy? Chanyeol frowns. What were they talking about? Why was their taking a hike such a big deal?
"Look, Minseok-ah..."
"I can't believe you went on a hike. Do you know what can happen if you push yourself too hard?! That's what physical therapy is for, Kangyeol! You're not like before and you're not superman! You can't just do things you want like you did when you had both of your legs!"
Something cold envelopes Chanyeol as he hears Minseok's shrill voice. He doesn't know exactly what's going on and he knows it's rude to eavesdrop. However, Chanyeol is missing something - something important. His feet won't move and his heart seems to have stopped beating. His ears roar with the silence from inside Minseok's unit and all he can hear is his own breathing. After a pause, Kangyeol's reasoning voice comes again.
"Minseok-ah, I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for making you worry. We have all the time in the world now. I'm joining this pack, remember? I'm not going back. I have all the time in the world to get better...and I'm going to get better with you by my side."
Minseok starts to sob and Chanyeol can hear this clearly. He listens to Kangyeol's soft murmurings to soothe Minseok and soon, Minseok's sobs subside. He doesn't know how he does it, but after a while, he finds himself back at his own quarters.
Chanyeol feels empty and his small room seems too expansive for him at the moment. His older brother had lost a leg... how? And what was this about Kangyeol not returning to his old pack? So many things confuse Chanyeol and without changing, without washing up, Chanyeol crawls under his sheets.
He closes his eyes, but all he can think of is Minseok sobbing and Kangyeol being the one there to comfort him.
++++
It's hard to come out of his room the next day. All Chanyeol can think about is how useless he is as a brother.
'What had he been doing while Kangyeol was fighting and sacrificing his whole body?'
The feeling of guilt consumes him and getting out of bed becomes the hardest physical thing to do. Chanyeol knows he's being a coward, that he's just holing himself in his room again. But this is more than he can handle at once.
Chanyeol can't bear to open the windows, even at night, for he's fearful that he might caught a glimpse of the moon.
After a few days of avoiding all forms of contact, Kyungsoo comes to visit him.
"What's wrong, Chanyeol-ah?" Kyungsoo asks gingerly, surveying the mess of Chanyeol's room.
The stagnant air in Chanyeol's room isn't a good medium, but Chanyeol can still smell the burnt caramel scent coming off of Kyungsoo. It should pique his interest and curiosity, but he's too overwhelmed with depression and with something else - the only thing that Chanyeol wants to know right now, is why he went to the cliff and why he fell off.
It seems that everything... every bad thing that's going on in his life right now comes down to one event... the fall, the cliff, that night. Chanyeol looks straight into Kyungsoo's eyes.
"Do you know, hyung?"
Kyungsoo remains silent, watching the intense, driven look in Chanyeol's eyes. Kyungsoo is reminded how everyone tip-toes around the subject, how no one wants to admit that Park Chanyeol had possibly committed suicide.
When the silence persists, Chanyeol takes it as an affirmative.
"Tell me, hyung" Chanyeol pleads.
And with a sigh, Kyungsoo opens his mouth.
###########################
i didn't mean to make
minseok sound like a
hysterical nagging s.o.
OTL i'm so sorry, minseok.
abo au
summary: chanyeol loses his memory but he's working hard at getting his life back. he's almost there and yet... he feels like something is missing.
They walk back to the living quarters. Though their pack's base is more like an army base, the living quarters mimic a neighborhood of apartments. The walk back is silent and Chanyeol stops in front of Minseok's unit to drop Kangyeol off.
"You can make it back by yourself?" asks Kangyeol.
Chanyeol can see the capillaries in his older brother's eyes. He's been working hard and he looks tired.
"Of course" Chanyeol says with a somewhat forced smile. "I'm not a baby, you know."
Kangyeol smiles weakly and turns to enter the unit. Chanyeol watches as Kangyeol disappears behind the door. And yet...thinking that Minseok is also behind the door, Chanyeol can't bring himself to leave right away.
He stands there, staring at the door and trying to imagine what it would be like to enter as Kangyeol. And it's just when Chanyeol decides to go that he hears the shouting.
Chanyeol hears Minseok's voice first.
"You didn't go?! What were you doing instead?"
Minseok's voice takes on a high pitched strain that hurts Chanyeol's heart to hear. His older brother's voice comes next, trying to be soothing and logical. Still, Chanyeol hears the weariness in Kangyeol's voice.
"I took a hike instead. It's okay. It's just like physical therapy. What matters is..."
"What matters is that you listen to the doctor. You can't get better by doing what you want, Kangyeol!"
Physical therapy? Chanyeol frowns. What were they talking about? Why was their taking a hike such a big deal?
"Look, Minseok-ah..."
"I can't believe you went on a hike. Do you know what can happen if you push yourself too hard?! That's what physical therapy is for, Kangyeol! You're not like before and you're not superman! You can't just do things you want like you did when you had both of your legs!"
Something cold envelopes Chanyeol as he hears Minseok's shrill voice. He doesn't know exactly what's going on and he knows it's rude to eavesdrop. However, Chanyeol is missing something - something important. His feet won't move and his heart seems to have stopped beating. His ears roar with the silence from inside Minseok's unit and all he can hear is his own breathing. After a pause, Kangyeol's reasoning voice comes again.
"Minseok-ah, I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for making you worry. We have all the time in the world now. I'm joining this pack, remember? I'm not going back. I have all the time in the world to get better...and I'm going to get better with you by my side."
Minseok starts to sob and Chanyeol can hear this clearly. He listens to Kangyeol's soft murmurings to soothe Minseok and soon, Minseok's sobs subside. He doesn't know how he does it, but after a while, he finds himself back at his own quarters.
Chanyeol feels empty and his small room seems too expansive for him at the moment. His older brother had lost a leg... how? And what was this about Kangyeol not returning to his old pack? So many things confuse Chanyeol and without changing, without washing up, Chanyeol crawls under his sheets.
He closes his eyes, but all he can think of is Minseok sobbing and Kangyeol being the one there to comfort him.
++++
It's hard to come out of his room the next day. All Chanyeol can think about is how useless he is as a brother.
'What had he been doing while Kangyeol was fighting and sacrificing his whole body?'
The feeling of guilt consumes him and getting out of bed becomes the hardest physical thing to do. Chanyeol knows he's being a coward, that he's just holing himself in his room again. But this is more than he can handle at once.
Chanyeol can't bear to open the windows, even at night, for he's fearful that he might caught a glimpse of the moon.
After a few days of avoiding all forms of contact, Kyungsoo comes to visit him.
"What's wrong, Chanyeol-ah?" Kyungsoo asks gingerly, surveying the mess of Chanyeol's room.
The stagnant air in Chanyeol's room isn't a good medium, but Chanyeol can still smell the burnt caramel scent coming off of Kyungsoo. It should pique his interest and curiosity, but he's too overwhelmed with depression and with something else - the only thing that Chanyeol wants to know right now, is why he went to the cliff and why he fell off.
It seems that everything... every bad thing that's going on in his life right now comes down to one event... the fall, the cliff, that night. Chanyeol looks straight into Kyungsoo's eyes.
"Do you know, hyung?"
Kyungsoo remains silent, watching the intense, driven look in Chanyeol's eyes. Kyungsoo is reminded how everyone tip-toes around the subject, how no one wants to admit that Park Chanyeol had possibly committed suicide.
When the silence persists, Chanyeol takes it as an affirmative.
"Tell me, hyung" Chanyeol pleads.
And with a sigh, Kyungsoo opens his mouth.
###########################
i didn't mean to make
minseok sound like a
hysterical nagging s.o.
OTL i'm so sorry, minseok.